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March 10, 2004

3 Fast 3 Furious? Thrice Furious, Thrice Stupid? Triple Fast with Triple X?

— Posted by John Campea

I’m going to have to excuse myself after this post to go punch myself flush in the crotch for at least an hour.

I just saw this news bit on television so I simply had to research it, and lo and behold, Countingdown.com has caught the news and so has Yahoo!…

Fresh off the assembly line at ‘The Plant for Flaccid Ideas’, a subsidiary company of ‘Guys Addicted to Pot Who Lie About Their Penis Size’, comes the new, fresh and horribly lame idea: Fast and the Furious Part 3. Sick.

Countingdown.com’s Article. and Yahoo’s Article.

2 Fast 2 Furious had my Razzie vote for “Poorest Excuse For An Actual Movie” in 2003. (That’s a real category folks, click here) And now this. I’m very curious what on earth they’re going to call this, I mean, since their use of the number 2 in the last title was so clever, of course. I suggest ‘The Fast and the Furious: Kill Yourself’ or maybe ’2 Fast 2 Furious Too’ or ‘So Lame my Ass Hurts’ or ‘I Have Lights Under my Car and I’m a Date Rapist.’. I don’t know, they can use those titles if they want.

So Vin Diesel is currently tugging on the bait line for being in this one. Which is the only hope for getting the dullards who haven’t figured out they’ve been shown the same movie twice already, in the door for a third one. 2005 Razzie Noms start today in my book.

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89 thoughts on “3 Fast 3 Furious? Thrice Furious, Thrice Stupid? Triple Fast with Triple X?

  1. If theres a 3rd movie, i’m sure i’m going to watch it like milions of people in the world. 9 in every 10 man loves cars and i’m sure 8 of them are going to watch this movie and at leat 6 are going to pay the ticket to see it.

    the histoy of the movie isnt very important, the most important in the movie are the cars, speed driving skills….

    but the only thing i ask for the 3rd is that it could be more realistic!!! please!!!

  2. Im only posting here once.

    Fuck most of ya’s i own an exact replica of the skyline but with way better shit in it at the Adelaide international raceway it ran 8.7

    Go on tell me that Aint Fast

  3. guys and gals.

    The movie might be low budget,it might have its flaws but the end of the day people go to see it for the cars,the babes, and the sound,it is not all about the plot of the movie.Some people don’t give a damn about the plot and watch the movie because they would like to own or see a car like that.

    and for all you arsewipes that think the honda s2k can’t keep up with a skyline.come to SOUTH AFRICA.we have a little suprise in store for you try a nissan 1400 bakkie that run’s a 8.5 seconds quartermile.or mazda bantam that runs a sub 8 seconds quartermile.any car can run a sub 10 seconds quatermile it depends on the mods and how the car is setup.

    we have golfs and opels running low 10′s.

    so guys stop dissing the movie(but holding on very tight to the crotch everytime one of those hot girls walk past.if you don’t like the movie don’t watch it.nobody really gives a damn about what you think

  4. It seems I have stumbled on this post a long time after the movies have been released, but it needs a further comment. First, this movie is not one you are going to walk away with some interesting insight and find a new meaning in life. It is simply a way to detach your brain and forget about life. Whether the director is good or not is not my call. I don’t have the time or energy to know about each director, nor do I really care to.
    About the vehicles that are in the films. I would be PISSED if I were Mitsubishi!! To have the floor boards of the vehicle fall off when the vehicle was going less then 100 mph is horrible. As an ex street racer I laughed at every Eclipse that came near us after the movie, wondering if the floor boards really would fall off…..
    Next, the thought that anyone in a little foreign car would square up against a 900 HP blown muscle car with a japanese car is hysterical. When we raced there were the racers and the talkers. We all know who the racers are and the talkers were hard to miss. All the stickers, wings, fins and HUGE exaust pipes that went from a 1 inch pipe to a 8 inch tip…. hysterical!
    Lastly….. I liked the movie for what it was inteded. Disconnect my brain and fill my face with popcorn! The flame throwers on the cars, the shopping cart looking wings on the cars and all of the rest was for the current groups of younger kids that like that crap. If there is a next episode I would hope they would be a bit more realistic, but then again that would sell as many tickets!

    Speed Safely!
    http://www.DomainPet.com

  5. Anyone who doesn’t like the movie is crazy. It’s the best. I love the cast in both of the movies and I just love the cars. Imagine if they sold cars like that in real life l’ll differenly buy one. I love the cars paul vin’s and tyrese drives. I would love to see the third one only if they were in it. I probably won’t. I would be very upset if none of them were in it. I hope everyone is complaining about this. I want them in it.

    Mia and Monica should be in it too.

  6. Hello,I am Brian
    Where is Paul Walker??????????????????
    Paul Walker is indispensable!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  7. Hey guys, I’m an S2000 2004 model owner and I have to tell you that they are wickedly fast without mods. I’ve burned a few of our local “racers”…although obviously I don’t speed. Ahem.

    However, I’ve seen videos of street races of an S2k against various other cars, and the S2k has been modded, and they are even faster. It is surprising. As most are saying it depends what’s been done on either side.

    Still, the underlying issue is, it’s only a movie. Yet they’ve chosen to place this movie in a very technical and knowledgeable world where, for the participants, it is about technicals and speed. So it’s only right that it should come under such close scrutiny.

    For those not involved in the world, they just like or hate the movie for what it is and not too concerned with the reality.

    So live with the two different viewpoints, there’s no point someone like me (a non street racer) trying to argue with a street racer. They know the facts more than me so they will critique the film from a technical angle and I’ll just look to see if my car is in it and the movie entertains.

    My S2k is stunning though. ;) Oh, and it’s not pink!

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