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July 9, 2004
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Welcome to Your New Low, I’ll be Your Wasabi Tuna for the Evening.

— Posted by John Campea

Anyone who has complained that some movie is the worst thing they’ve ever seen. Has not seen this. This, my pupils, is really, really bad stuff. Seriously. I’m dumbfounded.

Apparently, last year a film was made called Wasabi Tuna. The natural order of things told the world that this movie sucks. As fate would delightfully twist, it is apparently being released SOMEWHERE on August 6th. (Actually, just in San Francisco so far) I don’t know how or who or WHY anyone would touch this after seeing:

-I’m not kidding folks, this trailer is of such wildly horrific proportions, I’d rather dry hump my privates into a belt sander than watch it twice.

Folks, I know Tim Meadows isn’t an Oscar performer or anything, but this is of such bile, I actually caught myself thinking “how’d they get Tim Meadows in this?”
I’m almost temped to not link to their Website [whoops, I just did] – just to spare you from rocky, disturbed sleep for a fortnight.

Welcome to your lesson in bottom dwelling cinema. Oh yeah, Anna Nicole Smith is in it.

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7 thoughts on “Welcome to Your New Low, I’ll be Your Wasabi Tuna for the Evening.

  1. Maybe they should re-release the director’s cut full of naked shots of Lisa Kudrow, calling it (wittily enough), “Marci XXX”…..Ok it’s official I’m completely UNfunny and need to go to sleep…. :)

  2. Oh yeah, Marci X was so bad, that nobody knows it flopped harder than Gigli. In a way , they were lucky to get away with it so quietly.

  3. This is bad, but I don’t know if it could ever touch the baby-head-gang-rape that is “Marci X.” I’d rather have lost my virginity to a barn yard animal then to see that insult to film again.

  4. So *this* is what happens when washed up models, drag queens, has-been SNL performers, former soap opera stars, and a bunch of stereotypes get their hands on a copy of iMovie and decide to make a film.

    Seriously… WTF?!?!?

  5. I dunno.. sounds like it. -I just re-read the post and noticed I was shaking my head back n forth in disbelief the whole time.

    – While you’re at it, can I borrow your belt sander?

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