Two nubile, stranded women (Ana de Armas, Lorenza Izzo) reveal a sinister agenda after they spend the night with a married architect (Keanu Reeves).

I thought I would give the Keanu Reeves vehicle “Knock Knock” a shot. So I did. I now wish to beat hell that I would have shot down this abundantly ill-advised notion the instant it germinated.

This purported thriller was silly, superfluous, banal and just plain bad beyond all reason. There was but a solitary redeeming element in this entire merciless mess for me. And that pertains to the pair of young actresses who starred in the movie upon which this disaster was based, 1977’s “Death Game”, which I saw, liked and was shaken by for days. “Knock Knock” was Exec Produced by Sondra Locke and features a brief cameo from Colleen Camp, the two women who played the pair of deeply disturbed yet ravishingly beautiful home invaders of a well-to-do suburban family man left all by his lonesome nearly 40 years ago. Why they would tarnish the genuinely terrifying work they delivered then to be part of this trashy tripe is simply beyond me.

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Thistle.

Thistle who?

Thistle be one of, if not the, biggest pieces of crap I will ever have the misfortune of suffering through.