Ok, well all know that video game movies suck… and suck hard (I have the slightest glimmer of hope that the upcoming Prince of Persia MIGHT break the trend… but I’m not holding my breath). My basic argument as to WHY they all suck, is that games are not built for narrative storytelling. They’re developed for gameplay. Even in the largest scale game, when you break it down there is very little narrative in them, even though it might FEEL like there is more… there’s not.
So here comes news that Universal studio just spent a bunch of money to buy the right to develop… are you ready for this…. a movie based on the classic Atari game “Asteroids“.
ARE… YOU… FUCKING… KIDDING ME!?!?!?!
You had to pay MONEY for the rights to a story about… well… NOTHING??? It’s a triangle shitting out little dots hitting rock like objects. You’re going to build a MOVIE around that? Seriously?
Matt Lopez (Bedtime Stories, Race To Witch Mountain) has been attached to write the script… which should be all of about 4 pages.
What’s next? Pong The Movie?
