Guy Ritchie Directing The Dirty Dozen

Dirty-Dozen-Remake-RitchieThere is just no getting around it… The Dirty Dozen is just one hell of a movie. A man’s man movie. A film really reflective of a different era, but breathtaking nonetheless even today. I didn’t see The Dirty Dozen for the first time until about 5 years ago, and my jaw just hung open almost he entire time. It’s not the type of movie you can do today… well… at least not right.

Word has been going around (and apparently now confirmed) that Guy Ritchie (Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, Snatch) is taking the big chair to direct the Dirty Dozen remake. Our friends over at IESB give us the following:

The British Master of Bullets and Cheeky Bastards is set to round up a Dozen Dirty men and lead them off into combat. ImageWhile promoting the US Release of Revolver Guy confirmed a few quick items to our IESB crew.

1. He confirmed the rumor that he’s the man taking The Dirty Dozen to the lens.

I LOVE Ritchie as a director, and the original Dirty Dozen is magnificent, and I’m generally ok with doing remakes… but this doesn’t fit. First of all, the script doesn’t happen in World War 2…it happens in modern day where a group of Islamist extremists kiddnap some girl, and a rich daddy recruits a bunch of convicts to rescue her with the promise of freedom if they survive the mission. WHAT?!?!

More than most people I understand and appreciate the need for contextual adaptation… but this is NOT The Dirty Dozen. The pulse… nay… THE LIFE BLOOD of the original was its characters, its misogynist, bigoted, vulgar, balls hanging out characters and I’m sorry, but in a modern context you’ll NEVER be able to do those characters right. The guys in The Dirty Dozen made the Spartans in 300 look like a bunch of pussies. And they’re off to rescue a girl?!?!?! Please. In the original their mission was simple… GO KILL LOTS OF NAZIS YOU BAD ASSES!

I’m fine with remakes… but this is no remake. This is just another movie with the same title and one shared concept (prisoners offered freedom if they do something risky). And even with Guy Ritchie at the helm, I don’t have any faith in a project like this.

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